I am not my son’s favourite person. Not even by a long shot.
The world begins and ends with Nana (and Emmy from nursery school).
I am very lucky, the bond my parents have with my children is wonderful. They could not love them more or do more for my little family of three.
But I am not my son’s favourite and that sucks.
Tilly is a fully signed up member of the mama fan club but Arlo would rather be at nana’s house.
Sometimes it sucks that I don’t have endless time to just play. I have a house to keep clean, endless appointments for Tilly and a Tilly to keep amused/ keep away from him when she’s being violent (all of the time)
Sometimes it sucks that I have to be the bad guy. The one that says no to cake as a meal, the one that insists on bedtimes and the one that can’t just drop everything to play dinosaurs in the garden all day.
I am very grateful that my children have another parent figure in my mum. My childhood was wonderful because of her and she brings them both so much joy. My children would not be the wonderful beasties that they are without my mum. She is always there for endless cuddles, beach walks, ice creams and cake for meals (though my lovely Nan is the main culprit for Arlos cake habit). As much as it does suck that I am not number one, I’m glad that he has the same number one that I had growing up. My lovely, slightly terrifying mum. Love you, you old goat.
I hope that one day in the future Arlo will get it. I hope he will get that I was busy keeping the roof over his head and the food in his belly. I hope I can find the right balance between studying, working, volunteering, child raising and being a fun mum.
And just as I posted this blog:
Arlo – “I want you forever mummy”